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Hi friends, I solved a huge problem in my life. BUT I did it accidentally. What was it? The problem: problematic biased thinking. I was thinking problematically about people, ideas, events and the world. This made my mind unhealthy with thoughts which were unable to be put to rest. The amount of information I allowed to churn through my mind meant my brain whirled with information for hours unable to come to any solution. The solution: mind organisation. I started learning how to compartmentalise my thoughts. Learning how to see my emotions and apply reason, rationality and logic. I began to learn the ability to think clearly and solve almost all my problems with no more emotional baggage. I cleaned up my mind. It helps me every day with my life, relationships and success: at home at work with friends
How? I made a habit of separating my subjective thoughts from objective reality. I learnt critical thinking. What did I do? I have a PhD, so I was taught how to do it and I teach it. But what it ended up doing for me was profound. I became self-liberated. I was learning and reading philosophy. Philosophy taught me how to understand collective experiences. I read broadly across disciplines, and this interdisciplinary knowledge taught me how to make sure I know that there are always other sides to a story we can not see. This information REALLY matters! You do not have to learn philosophy or read hundreds of books to do this. I will teach you the skills. All you have to do is commit to letting me convince your to challenge your own mind. BE BRAVE & CALL YOURSELF OUT. INTELLECTUAL EMPATHY Whenever I had a conversation I transferred these skills. I thought: “what about the way you are thinking and speaking makes me and you the same?” Instead of thinking that other people were unlike me, I was able to see that we were mostly similar. This has made me exceptionally skilled at getting the best out of people. I began to be curious about people’s logic, ideas and their reasoning. By doing this I began to ask the right questions, fuelled by genuine curiosity. What ended up happening? PERSUASIVE COMMUNICATION Well, because I was engaging objectively (not making it about me) , I began being able to control the way in which the conversation went. This meant the speaker feels calm and shares more. So, this way, we can UNCOVER more, LEARN more, KNOW more. When you feel uncomfortable or annoyed about what someone has said, let that be a trigger to you that you need more information. Stop, do not assert your verbal judgement yet. It is too early but this is what most people do. Ask questions like: What has happened in the past to make you think like this about this topic? Do you think there is another way to see this problem? While they are talking, I am enquiring about logic, and by doing this I am able to establish and identify where arguments (ideas, thoughts, decisions) require further reasoning. I begin to take command of the conversation. The most valuable part, that this is not obvious to the speaker. In fact, the speaker always feels as though they are in charge. These are sophisticated communications skills. This is critical thinking and intelligent communication. You do not need to learn philosophy and read across disciplines to learn this. You just need to read my work. I will give you what I did for free. Right here each week when you read my Newsletters or follow my socials. PROBLEMATIC THINKING Problematic thinking (inability to critically think) is responsible for communication breakdowns, relationship breakdowns (work, home, online) and negative image of the world and the self. An example of a redundant, cognitively problematic contemplation: “Max does not like me, I can tell”. The questions I ask myself: Why do I care about this? Do I really know if Max does not like me? Should I do something to improve the situation with Max?
Often people are preoccupied with negative thinking and find no solutions to flip the situation. You must reflect deeply to find the true answer. You must hold your thoughts accountable. CRITICAL THINKING - EMOTION & REASON I can almost always turn a negative situation into a positive one with critical thinking skills and a good faith approach (charitable thinking). I do not spend a lot of time dwelling on problems. In fact, we must set timeframe to deal with thinking about it, then MOVE ON. Otherwise it bogs you down and impacts everything else in your day. I acknowledge and compartmentalise my emotions with rational questions and reflections. When you have a clear mind, you can make clear decisions. Our mind is SO good at throwing dated, irrelevant, ideas from the past as well as biases in the way as we try to THINK. Our power lies when we can clearly see what is blocking the way and VOLUNTARILY move them aside. We all have the ability to free our minds. And all you need is access to your own brain. The brain is the one place only you have the ability to access. No one else can get to it—unless you allow them. BARRIERS Most people believe that you need to have had a flawless upbringing with highly skilled and communicative parents, or invest years in therapy to acquire the skills your parents should have imparted to you. NO. What is flawless parenting anyway? And what good does a life without mistakes bring anyone when we need to be prepared to deal with the nuances of the human communication experience? I was raised by migrant parents who had to prioritise work to put food on the table while I struggled to be accepted into the community. I was bullied, excluded, tormented, abused, disadvantaged in many ways. Guess what though? Today, none of that baggage holds me down. Little can impact my steady conscience even though I am highly empathic and work tirelessly as a sociologist to better humanity. With these thinking practices, I can always sleep at night. “But I should not have to change, the world needs to change to accept me”. This is selfish and heavily problematic thinking. NO. The world will NOT change or accept you until YOU accept you. Just focus on that for now. TRUTH & BELIEF As soon as I believed I could be anything I wanted to be, everything started to happen. Whenever I am weak with my thinking, things fall apart. But as long as I take accountability and allocate the fallout truthfully, I grow every single time. With the requirement of zero skill except the ability to read and reflect, you can start today. If you do this now in a few months, you will be able to enhance the clarity of your thoughts, separate your emotion from reason and increase your ability to use logic to see the world. During my PhD as I read and learnt and wrote papers, I had to challenge my mind to think broader and move out and away from what I was reading. I had to think about ME as the person interacting with the literature. I had to learnt to separate myself from the words in order to think as closely to the truth as I could. I taught students this skill. I saw students minds open up and become strong and confident with their ability to see information and events for what they were not what their problematic thoughts perceived them to be. They became more productive, less distracted and more courageous to take on more challenging tasks. My Newsletters or my media channels on Instagram or Threads, will give you daily or weekly doses which will teach you to slowly practice strengthening the mind. You are on your way to mental freedom. Your Critical Thinker task for the day: Stop now and reflect: Why do I think the way I do? What has influenced my way of thinking? As people, we all have the ability to think as we do, so are people the same or are we different? Stay tuned for the Sunday Synapse, which will be delivered to your inbox every Sunday! Get ready to take on a new week better than you were last week! If it does not bring value to you, just hit the unsubscribe button below. Until next Sunday, take care. Dr. Esha.
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